Did your husband stay at the hospital with you 24/7?

When you had your first child did your husband or boyfriend stay up at the hospital with you every night you stayed? Im going in for an overnight induction so I know my boyfriend is going to stay up there the first night. The next day i'll be having the baby and probably staying another night. Im not sure how long you are kept at the hospital when you have a baby, but I figured Id be there 3 days max.





My boyfriend has commented that he will probably go home at night to sleep the extra two nights I stay up there. This makes me really really angry because I feel like I need him up there with me. Its our first baby and he needs to get used to helping out throughout the night and helping me since I will be hurting.





He said he will stay if I really want him to but he would rather go sleep at home than up at the hospital in a chair.





Would this make your angry also? or am I overreacting? Will I really need his help much in the middle of the night at the hospital?Did your husband stay at the hospital with you 24/7?
my husband stayed with me every night with both pregnancies,with our first i was there for two days with our second one i was there for just one night,it really wouldn't make me that angry if he didn't stay there to sleep over but i know he plans to in a way i actually feel bad that he does sleep over those chairs at the hospital are very uncomfortable trust me i don't know if you have ever had the chance to sleep on them but i have you just don't sleep comfortable at all no matter how much you try,you will be at the hospital where there are nurses that could help you during the night so its really not like you will not have help if you were to need it,trust me once the baby is born you will see how excited he will get, some times i feel the same way you do but there's really not much any guy can do right,i'm mean if you don't live that far away from the hospital just let him go home and rest if he really wants to.but don't let that get you madDid your husband stay at the hospital with you 24/7?
My husband did stay the night with our first son but with the second he went home both nights because after staying with the first and not getting a good sleep because of the uncomfortable sleeping arrangements he had, we were both exhausted when we got home. With the second, he was well rested when we got home and was more of a help to me. As far as you needing his help in the hospital, that is what the nurses are for.
I'm not having my husband stay just because I want him to be rested and prepared when we do finally get her home! The staff will be there to help ya out and take the baby for a couple of hours...it might even help ya rest if he's not there...I mean having a sulking man on the couch next to you huffing and puffing every time he has to toss and turn probably wouldn't make for the happiest of circumstances for ya! Congrats, congrats on your little one!!
You won't need him there after the induction night (I do understand why you would want him there that night), after that, let him sleep at home. He'll be more rested to help you after you get home and you'll have all kinds of nursing staff to help with anything you might need the other nights.





It's ok for him to not stay the entire time.
I am pregnant and i know my husband is going to want to be there the whole time whether he has to sleep on the floor or a chair it should not matter.


I don't think you are overreacting at all i can understand where you are coming from he is being a jerk.
I think you're getting some pretty rude responses... I will absolutely want my boyfriend to stay there with me for however many nights I'm there.





Maybe it's childish, but I think this is something we're going through together, and creating a family, and the family should be together at the hospital. Especially since this is your first.





Good Luck... and maybe he'll change his mind once he sees that beautfiul baby!!
I would be mad as well especially since its your first baby- I'm due today with my first baby and I think staying in the hospital is going to be scary so I've asked my boyfriend to stay with me both night that I'll be in the hospital just for support because its going to be hard plus I'm sure we'll be exhausted recovering from the whole child birthing process :)
Can't say I blame him-and no, my guy did stay with me, but we had a totally different situation and they brought him a cot at the hospital.





Now, there are nurses in the nursery to take care of your little one while you are resting after labor. It doesn't make you a bad mother for utilizing the help while it's available.





See if he'll curl up with you in the bed too.
I would want my husband to stay if possibel but at the same time I know that they dont give the men anyplace decent to sleep. So I know I will most likely tell him to go home and get a few hours of sleep at least and that way he can finish up any little things that need to be done aroudn the house as well.
Not sure what the right answer is but I also expect my boyfriend to stay with me over the night/s i'm there.
My Husband NEVER left my side!! I think he may have left to go to Wal-Mart once but that was all until we went home. He even took off a week or more from work to help out.
First of all - congrats! Second, I was induced (my 2nd baby) on 09/11/09 @ 5:30 p.m. and did not have the baby until 02:51 a.m. on the 12th and induced labor was the most painful thing in the world. I was by myself and the nurses were extra awesome. The pain you will be experiencing (not to scare) will probably make you NOT want to see him at all!





With my first though, my husband was there for the most part but at times I just wanted him to leave! I wanted to rest without worrying about how I looked, etc. (I know it sounds stupid but let's be honest). And I wanted time with the baby. He is now 7.





So no, you are not overreacting to me but do take the opportunity to have a peaceful drug-induced rest while the baby is in the nursery before the real work of motherhood begins.





Hope that helps. Men just don't get it so why trip?





:-)
Yes, my husband stayed with me the whole time while I was in the hospital. I was induced, but then I had to have a c-section. I stayed in the hospital for 4 days after that. I really needed him there after I had the c-section to help with the baby and to help me out. There was a fold-out futon-bed that he slept on. The only times my husband left me was when he went home to shower and feed the cats. We only live 10 minutes from the hospital, so he was with me most all the time. I think that is important. You will probably want him with you too. I don't think it's unreasonable to ask him. The least he could do is sleep on an uncomfortable chair / bed for a night or two.





Good luck!
First, yes, my boyfriend stayed with me 24/7. I was induced at 5AM, our daughter was born at 1:58PM. We had visitors until 11PM. I wouldn't sleep while people were there holding my baby. I just couldn't do it. So I was EXHAUSTED when everyone left. He got to sleep a little while I was being induced (before labor really began, I was too excited to sleep). That first night, I didn't even hear my daughter crying until he was already up and taking care of her.





Have you done a tour of the maternity ward yet? If not, go check it out. My hospital had these chairs that folded out (like a hide-a-bed) so he could sleep somewhat comfortably. I stayed for two nights because I had a high white blood cell count (infection).





I absolutely agree with you that your boyfriend should stay. You WILL need him. I could walk and everything, but I got weak and dizzy very easily so it was nice to have him there to help me get up and get to the bathroom. He should stay with you the entire time.
my bf was there pretty much the whole time and part of me wanted him to go home so that I could have a little me time...... yes your going to be sore but I dont think its that big of a deal if he only stays some of the time! I would def say that she should stay the first night after the baby is born, but after that you might even want him to go home :) I would say that really its not worth getting mad at now and kinda just roll with it when you have the baby! Good luck and congrats :)
It would make me angry as well. My husband made a similar comment to me, but I think he was more joking around and giving me a hard time. When it comes down to it, he may change his mind. He does need to be there with you to help you. Even if you are the one feeding, the least he can do is get up and hand you the baby. It's not fair to you, especially since you won't be getting much sleep either for him to say I want to go home so I can get rest because these chairs are uncomfortable. Not fair for the baby either. I'm sure she wants her daddy there as well. Essentially he's acting a little selfish. Maybe just talk to him again and let him know that your both in this together and that it would mean a lot to you if he was there for you in this journey.
What a goober! My hubby was at the hospital every second with me (except for once when I sent him home for stuff I forgot to put in my hospital bag). I was there 3 days and 2 nights and he was there always. I'm sure you will want your baby in your room with you all day and night and he SHOULD be there with the two of you. My hubby just KNOWS he is staying the whole time. He wants to spend all of his time with the baby you've been waiting for for 9 months. Your bf has issues.
Wow...I'm actually really surprised at these questions, because I agree - I want my husband at the hospital with me, end of story. Luckily, we are delivering at a hospital with a brand-new, state-of-the-art maternity wing, where babies and daddies are encouraged to stay in the room with mom. Even if we weren't, I would still want him to stay. Hospitals are creepy at night, and he is my husband, and it will be the first night with our firstborn...and if he wants to complain about discomfort, I would laugh...because I'm pretty sure that I'm the one that hauled around with a baby in my stomach for 40 weeks then pushed him out of my hoo-ha, lol. He can handle a night or 2 of being uncomfortable.





Just talk to your boyfriend, and try not to let anger get the best of you when you do, simply because anger is counter-productive. The hospital stay isn't about his comfort, it's about your baby's and your own, end of story. And if that's selfish or babyish, oh well. I guess I'm a selfish baby, too!!!





On a brighter note, you'll probably only have to stay in for the 2 nights...the night you are induced, and the night after...providing everything went well.





Good luck, and congrats!
My husband stayed every night. He left during the day after our son was born to go home and do a couple of errands, but my mother came to the hospital to help me.


Yes, I would be angry. You are going to need his help those first few nights. At our hospital, the nurse would bring our son in from the nursery (they told us to let them take care of him so I could recover) to nurse, but I couldn't get around well because I had a c-section. My husband helped a LOT.


See if they can get an extra bed for him. If his reason for not wanting to stay is because he doesn't want to sleep in a chair, that's crap. There are plenty of other things going on beside whether or not he is sleeping comfortable.


This might sound selfish, but he needs to make sure you have everything you need, and needs to make sure he comes second.


Hope this helps.





Edit*:


Is there a reason why Sapphire M copied my answer and put it as her answer?????
Sweetie, its your hormones, you are over reacting. My husband went home to sleep at night so he could help in the day. You wont be hurting that terribly much, just sore, and you're a big girl so you can handle it. Whatever help you need at night the nurses will help with, it will be mostly feeding the baby, if you want at night they will even change him/her for you. The hard part will be upon going home. He is staying the first night, that is normal but for God sakes let the boy sleep. How is he going to help you if he is running on no sleep while you sleep nicely on a bed but he has to sleep in a chair? Thats selfish on your part. You will be ok, congratulations and don't worry all pregnant woman are like this. It just depends on the person how they react to it and how terrible they become during pregnancy.





i can understand him staying if you are having a c-section. but if its normal and everything is ok just let him sleep. otherwise he will be no help. notice most of the woman whose husbands stayed with them had c-sections and in that case i would have had mine stay. he stayed the first night for me. i let him go home after for the night and he would be back at 7 am :)
When I had my son my fiance stayed with me both nights. Well three actually I went into labor at 11pm. He stayed but I let him leave during the day. He would go shower and change. Maybe grab a bite to eat. Tell your boyfriend that they might give him a bed if they have enough. You wont really need the help through the night, the hospital nurses will bring the baby in an basically stick him or her on your boob if your breast feeding or give you the bottle. They are very helpful. My fiance slept through almost all of that. But I wouldnt worry . Once he see's the baby you will have to pry her out of his hands. good luck. Children are amazing.
I have 2 previous children from another relationship. This is mine and my husbands first child together. I never had anyone stay at the hospital with me at night when i had my other two children and me and my husband were talking one day about the baby rooming in and I told him that the baby would just go to the nursery at night after he left so that I could sleep and he told me that he was not leaving and that the baby would stay in the room with us. I thought it was so sweet. :)
When my baby was born the hospital didn't yet have private rooms in L%26amp;D so daddies couldn't stay overnight. It wasn't really a problem for me. (Baby was in the nursery due to some health concerns, and there were plenty of nurses to help out when I needed it.)





I HAVE stayed overnight with my daughter in the hospital when she was older ... the pull-out chairs are horrendously uncomfortable. I think that you're a big girl, and you should be able to manage without your boyfriend for those few hours each night. Better for him to be rested so when you DO go home, he won't be wiped out and will be able to help.
I think the problem here is that he is the 'boyfriend' and not the husband. He doesn't have any real obligation to you or the baby. It says in the Holy Bible when man and woman wed they become ';one flesh';, I have heard some situations where the male experienced the same things the wife did while pregnant. If you want that deep connection and understand from this man get married, and preferably invite Jesus into your lives.
You're being a CHILD about it! You shouldn't need help and if you do there are plenty of nurses there! There isn't any point in him being exhausted when it isn't necessary. You'll NEED him when you get home and want to get some extra sleep! Time to grow up hun, you'll have a child, you don't need to be one yourself!
Your Husband Needs Rest TOO





WHy would you be there for 3 days ?





You go home 24 hours after baby is born





the only reason you would stay there for more than 24 hours is because you had to have c-section or had computations after birth





I wouldn't be angry I would want my husband to get rest those hospital chairs are very uncomfortable








Everyone is different, If you feel angry then feel angry no one can change yor mind only you can.





And if you truely want him there then tell him hey I dont want you to Leave, thats if you have to stay for so many days
yes





You are going to need his help those first few nights. At our hospital, the nurse would bring our son in from the nursery (they told us to let them take care of him so I could recover) to nurse, but I couldn't get around well because I had a c-section. My husband helped a LOT.


See if they can get an extra bed for him. If his reason for not wanting to stay is because he doesn't want to sleep in a chair, that's crap. There are plenty of other things going on beside whether or not he is sleeping comfortable.


This might sound selfish, but he needs to make sure you have everything you need, and needs to make sure he comes second