How to find out if your boyfriend of 3 years is faithful?

we've known each other for 3 years but 1 1/2 been dating. Hes from NY and i'm from MN. its a long distance relationship but i recently moved to NY in Jan. 2008. Before i moved out here, he had a crazy ex girlfriend that i did not know about until one night she called me and told me that she is still seeing him and wanted me to know because i don't deserve to be with him, and that i can do so much better. But remember she was crazy over him, although they only dated for a couple of months, which was 6 years ago, i can't figure out why she can't let him go. Thats why i feel like they still have something going on because she keeps coming back to him. She is indeed crazy because she knows everything about me. My boyfriend tells me not to believe her because shes doing this to make his life miserable because when they use to date, he would sleep with other girls and after doing so, she went crazy, as in crazy in love with him. Until this day she continues, he tells me to pay no mind to it, but how can i not when shes calling him leaving voicemails, not only that but she calls me too. She got my # through the house caller ID. She goes over to his house to visit his mom just so she can have information on us. I KNOW shes crazy, but is there something else that is going on? Please HELP this isn't the first time that shes done this, this is the 5th time. We always have ignored her but this time, its just too much. I don't want to believe her because she knows too much but then again i don't want to believe my boyfriend as well because he's not doing anything about it!





HELP....How to find out if your boyfriend of 3 years is faithful?
I don't see how anyone can possibly answer this question without knowing all the facts.. what are all your star signs?How to find out if your boyfriend of 3 years is faithful?
I would trust your boyfriend, but most importantly, i would talk to his mother. If this crazy woman visits his mom, i bet she would know stuff. Mother knows best! And i don't think he is cheating on you.
well about your bf


believe him intel you know other wise





and about her call the police this would be considered stalking of you and your bf
well ask other ppl around him


that you know


and you can trust and


see what they say


or go on that show cheaters


yeah you'll find out


well good luck
grow up...either go to the police for harassment and tell her off, or leave...cause you obviously don't trust the guy...being an adult means taking care of yourself...so try it.
Sounds like a load of bull. Don't tell me you're actually beginning to believe her lies? Sounds like she's just jealous.
Call cheaters or do your own PI work.
Here is my opinion on the ';crazy ex-girlfriend'; issue. Guys don't date a girl that is initially crazy. They date them and during the relationship the guy drives the girl to crazytown. And if he cheated on her you can't be so sure he won't cheat on you too. I don't believe the whole, ';She was over at my house visiting my mom'; story. That sounds like total BS to me. The whole situation is just too much drama. It doesn't sound healthy for you.
Take this from a guy,your man IS messing around. You caught on to the fact that they still have an intimate connection because she's knows a lot about YOU. That is a definite cause for concern. Your man should have enough respect to keep you out of whatever else he may have going on. And of course she's going to tell you that he's no good and to leave him and blah blah blah - she wants you OUT of the picture. 6 years ago and this chick is STILL around? Believe me, its been less than 6 YEARS since they spent time. You 2 arent friends - she dont give a .... about you.


On his defense,he can see and sleep with whoever he wants.And so can YOU. You dont' own eachother and are not eachothers personal belongings. But I think its foul to not be straight up about it. At the same time,you can't expect someone who claims to love you after 3 years to just blurt out ';I'm fu--ing my ex..'; Its not going to happen and if you wait for that,you are wasting your time.


You also have to consider how crazy this girl is.Is she violent? Is she clean? God forbid they are getting busy and not using protection. This puts you danger in many ways. And who's to say she doesnt have a man of her own and doing HIM dirty. 'Cause any girl who messes with a man who's involved will also mess around on thier significant other. You might end up in more than a triangle.


I'm not saying I'm right,but I was that guy saying ';I'm not cheating'; and when my supposed girl came to visit me, I lied and said my ex was enfatuated just to make myself look like a good guy. When in reality,I was seeing the other girl for 8 months while my girl was out of state.


Remember all men cheat. Its not that we dont like the women we are with. We are carnal creatures that are weak to the flesh. We like variety. Its natural. Just look at lions,dogs....only difference we cant lick our own tails.


I suggest you let this one go and find another. It will not be a one time thing. I know its easier said than done,but you have to look out for you. You will suffer more than a broken heart. You risk getting sick, confrontation you might not expect,or worse. Its not worth it baby. Its hard to leave a 3 year relationship...or is it??? Yea, you may be cool with his family n all that,but you arent sleeping with his family,are you?


Think about YOU. Take care of YOU. Because if not,how can you possibly take care of anyone else?
im soory to say this and i know all men are not a like but 98% the same i to had a man with a crazy ex and i did not wount to beleave that anyhting was going on even thow swhe new everything abuotu me and my number and would call him while i was there and of cours he would not talk to her in front of me rather behinds my back so i triked him and suggest you do the same i told him i was going out of town and stayed at a friends house and she called me and told me that she was in my house so i drov eover and sure enogut they were in bed togehter talk about my heart falling out of my cest so my advise to you trick them both tell him and her that u are leaving for the weekend and just have some friends check your house or go over there to see for ex you needed something but you left iy behind it ok you left it behind you just wanted to amke sure it was there and you could not get a hold of yourr boyfriend to see if it was there ,,,and then when she cals you or even drive by your hosue a few times at night to see if any one there call him ask him what he is doing and if you cach him in a lie say he says he sleeping but youknwo his car is gone and no were to be found well why lie aobut you sleeping try it you might not find that anything is going on but then you might


good luck
Well I'd question the fact that she knows oh so much info about you when she's never met you in her life? are you sure the bf is.. And did she start coming over to his mom's house when your bf moved back to live with his mom or was it before that time that this chic started going over there..


I guess I'd play it save and not sure that I'd trust either one of them personally..
YOU DO HAVE THOSE OUT THERE ARE TRULY CRAZY AND JUST DON'T KNOW WHEN TO LET GO BUT WHAT I CANT UNDERSTAND IS WHY HE HAVEN'T TAKING THE PROPER ACTIONS TO GET RID OF HER BECAUSE IT SEEMS TO ME HE WANTS HIS CAKE AND EAT IT TO TO BE HONEST HE ENJOYS HER. PLEASE BELIEVE IF HE CHEATED ON HER WITH OTHER ONES HE CHEATING ON YOU TO I DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW HE STAYS IN CONTACT WITH HIM AFTER SIX YEARS AND THERE IS NO POINT IN TALKING TO HIS MOTHER BECAUSE SHE WOULD ONLY TELL U WHAT SHE WANT YOU TO KNOW DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME. I HAVE A PROBLEM WIT THE MOTHER ALLOWING HER TO COME OVER HER HOME IF SHE UNDERSTANDS THAT HER SONS WANTS NOTHING TO DO WIT THE EX SO I'M CONFUSED ITS MORE TO THIS WHOLE STORY BUT WHATEVER THE CASE I DON'T TRUST HE AND I D*** SURE DON'T TRUST HER SO GET OUT BEFORE SOMEONE GETS HURT IF NOT YOU HIM
She sounds like a real problem. Then again, what is she doing at his house when you call? If she was history 6 years ago, how did she get into his home when you called. He could have changed his phone number, his door locks or moved away from her. He is not being honest with you, she is still in his life, just forget him, long distance relationships have a very high failure rate. Now you're in NY, I hope you're not on his neighbourhood.
most girls are batshit crazy...if you are not, then she probably is; it's usually is about 50/50. if she knows anything particular about him that she is telling you to get under your skin, it is either something she knows from when they were still dating or something her crazy *** somehow found out and is trying to use to break you up. if she is really as crazy as you say she will probably go to some length (like visiting his mom) to figure out specific things to say to you to make it seem as though she is telling the truth. don't believe her until you have absolute proof. Go talk to his mom if the girl goes to visit her, see what she has to say.





But if your boyfriend is being sketchy and not really denying it then I am not sure what you are going with him anyways. Get a direct answer from him so you can tell it to the crazy ***** or find out if he is bullshitting you.
in my opinion he is diffidently cheating on you its been going on way to long to just sit there and say she is crazy hes trying to hang on to both of you with bull s**t there is just to much info. i would get rid of him and go on with your life yes it will hurt but you will get over it and find a nice truth full guy with no ropes attached
I think there is something more to this story. She may not be as crazy as you think. Yes, she is acting very invasive and the fact she knows alot about you is odd...however...are you sure she is getting this info from the mother? She may be getting it from your so called boyfriend. Yeah, there are crazy women out there who will cling to a guy and make up a story...but sometimes you get a crazy woman that has the guy leading her on and then he tells everyone else she's crazy...but then he calls her and when they are alone, he plays her.





And..he isn't doing anything about this.





You are absolutely right to be concerned about this. It could get a lot more ugly.





I've had a long distance relationship before and it was great until he moved to where I was and then it fell apart. I saw things in his personality and in his own stories that he never showed me even when he would visit often. He turned out to be the opposite of who I thought he was. I think this has happened to you as well.





My best advice would be to let this guy go. Leave me to his ex (or is she?) and get away from the drama. Find someone who respects you.





Everyone has baggage...but this is very suspicious.





Run! Find a better safer guy!
thats kind of common with exes if they break up wit der guy and then they fall for him again so they harass the girl he wit out. trust me. ignore the crap out of her. dont even talk to her.
Calmly and rationally tell your boyfriend that it's becoming a serious issue that he needs to deal with. If he refuses to do anything about it, ask him if you can take action. Also, have you considered getting the authorities involved? She is definitely overstepping your privacy rights, and would be considered a stalker!
The only reason she knows so much is because he has to be telling her these things. I don't really know of many girls who would continue to harrass their ex after 6 years. Something fishy is definitely going on. She knows when you're away, she knows that he's sleeping early, how on earth would anyone else know that? I doubt that she's crazy, I'd say that's the only excuse your boyfriend has for her behaviour - as in, he wouldn't admit to doing the wrong thing.


If he slept around on her, it's more than likely possible he is doing the same to you.


If he is serious that nothing is going on he should change his numbers and ask for a restraining order on her. If he refuses, then there's your answer.