Okay, I really need advice here. My boyfriend and I have known each other for six years, been going out for one year and been having sex for about the same time as we’re been going out. And ever since I lost my virginity to him, I’ve been faking orgasms. But no, not just one faked orgasm per ‘session’, but as many up to nine, because I thought that it was normal. He also butted heads with some of his friends who were telling him that nine or whatever number over one was almost impossible. I have no idea why I lied to him, and why I kept going. Some days I just told myself, “No, you’re not faking today. You’re going to stop all of this lying,” but I couldn’t. I thought that by lying, that I could use those faked orgasms to not only make him feel better, but me. You see, I’m not very feminine, or uber girly, not to mention that I didn’t bleed at all when I lost my virginity, which I know isn’t too-too normal. Maybe by faking orgasms I could seem more normal and more attractive?Faked every orgasm with my boyfriend for the last year-has any women out there told your boyfriend? How?
Well lying to him is going to make him feel inadequate. Even if he says it doesn't bother him and he'll try harder, its going to be in the back of his mind. What it will do is flip the coin from you being unsatisfied to him being unsatisfied. And that might not work. I would first attempt to figure out mental things to make yourself have the orgasms and then go from there.Faked every orgasm with my boyfriend for the last year-has any women out there told your boyfriend? How?
tell him or show him what he needs to do for you to get a real one
wait till u guys get into an argument and let him have it
';remember all those time i was moaning and you thought i was cumming...did i ever tell you i used to be a drama major actress??';
that should get him and youre guilt free
Why would you want to tell him? Focus on learning to enjoy it and reaching an actual orgasm, rather than focusing on telling him you have been lying to him for the past year. If you haven't had one real one, then maybe there is something wrong. Are you not enjoying yourself? Tell him things you like done that make you feel really good and he'll learn to do what you love. If you just fake it, he'll think he's doing it right when he's actually not. If you insist on telling him, so you can get it off your chest, just tell him that you have been faking it because you didn't want him to think he was doing something wrong. But if you tell him, tell him its not what he's doing, it has to do with you not knowing how to reach the ultimate goal (orgasm). My husband didn't get an orgasm til he was 19 because he didn't know how (his imagination wasn't enough, but he was able to when getting a porno as a gag gift for christmas from someone). There is something that can be done, most likely, to get you to be able to. Just explore a bit, and tell him what you like, and perhaps you'll find what it takes to get you to stop faking it, and actually have a real one.
damn how u did sex before marriage?if he leave u what u will do?duno y u guys only want a sex or this give u more pleasure everytime?
I don't think that you should tell him , that will only hurt him , and I don't think that faking is that big of a deal , It's not like you are lying to him about something serious I mean . I also think that you should sort of guide him to what feels good for you , so that you really can have one . There is no harm in experimenting ..
truth is always better...
i wouldnt tell him. I know honesty is the best policy but there are some things i think are best kept untold and this is one of them. Telling him will seriously knock his confidence, and will put him off sex for fear of doing it ';wrong'; You shouldnt have faked to begin with (but you know that) by faking he thinks that what ever he is doing is ';working'; and is undoubtadly going to repeat that over and over again to get the same result. My advise is to start your sex life all over again and take it back to the beginning. (difficult i know given your current situation) but you got your self into this mess and now its time to get you out with little damage as possible to your boyfriend. Suggest to him that you would like to try new things and new possitions to experience more with him and try and get a deeper and harder orgasm. Once you try experimenting, you can find out what position/speed etc helps you climax into a real orgasm. Then perhaps you might find it helpful and stimulating to add props and toys to your sex sessions. DONT be tempted by faking each and every time, although it is said in some cases women can fake them selfs into a real orgasm but i suggest you find the real one before opening that can of worms again.
Good luck
tell him the truth and teach him how to give you one properly...
Dear Anna, I understand your dilemma. In reality you are focusing on the wrong problem. The question in reality is why you don't have orgasms. There are a lot of women that don't have the same conception of pleasure and you might be one of them. No panic. Just take some time and find a way to please yourself, you need to please yourself before you think of the other person. If you do the contrary you risk of hitting a wall sooner or later.
that sucks! i've been there except when i told my ex it was awesome because he was a jerk. i say tell him but be really nice and see if u can work together to achieve it..if u keep lying it hurts both of you
Nine in a session is totally possible, I know I've had that. But what you need to do is start to do other positions and the such to find where your sensative areas area. It was bad to lie to begin with because then he won't change because he thinks he is satisfying you. What you need to do is try to find your spot now.
First of all l would not tell him you lied, not when you know what his reaction will be.Why don't you tell him that you want to experiment a bit and try something different, ask him what he would like you to do to him and you can tell him what you want, half the fun is trying different things, and spice things up a bit. I am sure he will want to try. Good Luck.
faking orgasms sounds very boring
instead wasting ur time faking it why not once try the real thing
it makes the difference
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